7.4.07

Compendium of All Terms: Chim

Note: The following attempts not to create an exhaustive list of all terms related to "chim"

The Compendium of All Terms: Chim

with notable contributions from all disciplines designed by academics that are not meant to be easily understood by human beings


The term "chim" is a distinctively localized word connoting a similar meaning to "difficult" and "incomprehensible." Often, the audience of the material in question is subjected to various psychological and cognitive trials that usually leaves him/her bewildered and making no sense of the information presented.

The very first of such trials is physical in nature: a well-compiled textbook that incorporates a glossy design that, although uncreative, does not matter since the focus is not on the form, but the substance contained within the cover pages. The thickness ranges from 2 - 6 cm, with a tendency towards the larger figure a preferred choice of the authors.

Flipping over the first few pages of foreword and introductions, the reader is then subjected to a view of myriad and complex paragraphs that do not conform to communication principles; by this, it is meant that the size of the words are read best by image-scanners, such as xerox machines, than human eyes. The puny size suggests that alternative uses may be derived from reading the text within - providing an excuse for "tired eyes" and "cognitive overload," as well as preparing the reader for future short-sightedness which, it is hoped, does not benefit the authors who might be collaborating with optical shops in a joint-venture to receive cash flows from both the sales of such textbooks and vision-correcting spectacles that arise as a complementary need required for the reading of the books.

A sequential flow of material - introduction, theories, formulas, glossary and index - are shown neatly to the reader, but by no means are the content sequential. Apparently, the authors do not take into account the limited processing capabilities of their target audience, who would most likely not venture into the field of academic research and professorship, and are thus guilty of several mistakes that ought to be avoided, but nevertheless was not:

1) Lengthy sentences that serve as sources of confusion, leading to an internal debate within the reader with respect to the intended meaning;
2) Lengthy introductions and unnecessary information, which usually comes from the authors' intention of providing background information or attempting to display a sense of humor best appreciated by fellow academics;
3) Terms which have got to have a better substitute (in other words, comprehensible, no-frills attached technical phrases). This is especially so in economics and psychology textbooks, where the law of diminishing marginal returns set in upon cognitive overload of the reader, which enhances the perceptual biases he/she has of diminishing returns to economies of scale (this sentence is not meant to mean anything)
4) Practice questions that always incorporate numerous assumptions and leaving room for meaningless debate during tutorial sessions and the standard of which would never appear in the final examinations anyway (practice is equivalent to easy... get it?)
5) Incessantly thorough, as though the national spirit of Singaporeans have well invaded the personalities of the authors. This spirit is known loosely as "scare lose." Of course, given the rapid pace of Singapore universities, it has always been a challenge - for students - to understand and apply material to a hopelessly tough paper after a mere 14 weeks of intensive study. Interestingly, the amount of effort taken to go through the material may suggest that the student would actually integrate it into the existing knowledge pool that he/she possesses - research has shown that this does not happen (the speed of which this process of conveniently deleting the material from memory occurs at a seemingly shocking, though to professors only, rate that begins at "Pens down, stop writing" and finishing at no more than 10 seconds after such a phrase is said).

All in all, with such interesting issues for academics to ponder, it is suggested that a new field of research be conducted on all things chim. One can begin from defining the terms that are to be used in this new field; instances from other disciplines, such as the following and their related examples, may be considered:

- Mathematics: Calculus, Vectors, Matrices, Algebra etc
- Physics: Velocity, Newton's Laws, Theory of Relativity
- Computer Science: Algorithmns, Object-Oriented Programming, Java, Windows
- Geography: Physical Environment, Continents, Urbanization

The writer of this entry has suggested that simple terms be used to deal with such a complex field. To fully capture and illustrate the core essence of such an area, he has decided to use the localized word "chim" (and its variants) for the respective purposes (examples of situations which are deemed appropriate for the words are also presented to clarify any doubts, which is a feature currently devoid in textbooks):

- Chim: As intended. When the material presented is difficult for brain processing, using this word can assist in communicating the emotional response of the reader.
Example: A student sees a hardcover, 1000-page theoretical physics textbook. Flipping the pages of endless theorems and formulas, he utters the word "chim" and fellow students nod in agreement.

- Chim-ed: The past tense of chim, it is used whenever something of a chim nature is no longer chim. Note - it must be written as chim-ed, in order not to confuse it with "chimed."
Example: "I just understood that when you add 1 to 1, it gives you 2 - such a previously difficult concept has become chim-ed."

- Chimnify: The actioning of chim, it is used whenever a concept must be phrased rigorously with terms that are not normally used.
Example: "I know probability is just about chance - but the use of terms like cumulative distribution function, analysis of variance and statistical significance only serve to chimnify the entire topic."

- Chimnism: The study of all things chim, this is the newly proposed discipline for academic study.
Example: When the dean proposed to the president that chimnism be included in next year's research budget, he replied, "We are not here to make difficult things easy for our students, so let's just keep the budget restricted to researching for more easy things that we can make difficult for our students."

- Chiminology: Any word or term related to chimnism is part of the chiminology dictionary.
Example: The field of chimnism has not been taken seriously as its chiminology is not deemed challenging enough for students, for it only includes five variants of chim, as stated above.

(i was in lecture yesterday with my friend, and we got so bored we started talking about the topic of chim. so that explains this entry)